In ADVICE + THOUGHTS

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It’s been a while since I’ve written about what’s been on my mind, so I guess Monday night is a good night for it. For the most part, we all go through the same stuff. We just choose different ways to deal with it. I’ve read that when you write something down it creates clarity in your mind. And that writing and rewriting your thoughts gives direction and focus and helps reaffirm how you feel about certain things.. you should try it. Here’s what I’ve been telling myself lately that you probably need to hear too (and some quotes for pinning!):

 

Be Present.

We’re always waiting for the weekend. That vacation. Someone else. When we’re gonna do that thing those other people are Instagramming about. We glamorize memories like we can get them back somehow. We forget that the moment we’re in right now is all we have, and we spend it worrying about the next one that’s not even here yet. Take time this week to just sit there, chill out, listen to your favorite music, just THINK. Be present in the moment. Happiness is not feeling like you should be somewhere else, doing something else, being someone else. We’re very good at preparing to live, but we need to get better at just living.

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Stop being such a control freak.

The more you try to control things the more miserable you’ll be. And believe me, I know this because my type-A personality makes myself miserable 95% of the time trying to find control. Realize the only thing you actually have control over are thoughts inside your head – and that will change your life. You can make yourself miserable if you want, but that’s no way to live your life. Being at peace with yourself and your circumstances is the ultimate position of power.  “Your calm mind is the ultimate weapon against your challenges“.

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It’s ok to talk about your feelings.

I’ve learned that there’s no better way to find peace about something than to talk about it with your closest friends. Having an open heart is so good for your mental health. Empathizing with others is good for your soul and a way for you to see your problems through someone else’s eyes. And if you feel like shutting the door, sitting on your bedroom floor and crying..then do it. Get it all out. It’s good for you I swear.

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Your self-confidence is so attractive.

I always fall for the over confident guys and I’m drawn to friends who know who they are and what they want. It’s something that’s so attractive to me. Like I wrote in this post last month, don’t be so worried about what other people think. Be unapologetically who you are and people will be drawn to you for that.

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Don’t settle when it comes to love.

And don’t work yourself up over someone or something that doesn’t check all the boxes for you. There is someone out there who you won’t have to make excuses for – and they will understand how you operate and they will love you despite all of your flaws and any walls you’ve put up. You only get to pick ONE PERSON. Don’t feel like you need to settle for something or someone that’s convenient. The hard part is trusting that and being patient. And being picky is probably the best thing you could do for yourself when it comes to dating. A better, more compatible love is out there for you – and actually a lot more than just one.

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Positive self talk is CRUCIAL.

The way you talk to yourself is so important. We’re constantly having conversations with ourselves in our heads. It’s possible to raise your general level of happiness by just shifting your perspective. If you aren’t going to be your own cheerleader, then who is? Before I used to compete or perform in college I would visualize myself doing it perfectly and convince myself in my mind that was how it was going to turnout before I even started. That’s how it is with most things in life – 10% skill 90% mental.  This has always been one of my favorite quotes:

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Thanks for reading my two cents. Enjoy being present in the moment right now – take it all in tonight 🙂 xo

 

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Showing 15 comments
  • Paula Dolubizno
    Reply

    Thank you for this 🙌🏼 Everyone needs a little thinking time especially in today’s world. We mustn’t forget to enjoy every minute of life and not sweat the small stuff! PS- your hair is GORGEOUS!!! I’m envious!

  • Erika
    Reply

    Needed this so much more than I knew. Thank you!

  • Kerri Schreiber
    Reply

    This is exactly what I needed right now. Thank you for your insight and positivity! ❤️

  • Christen
    Reply

    Thank you for this. I needed it. You are an inspiration!!

  • Joylyn Dumadag
    Reply

    Thank you for the reminders 😊

  • Hope
    Reply

    I love this, Olivia! Thank you!

  • Leeann
    Reply

    So glad I found your blog! Thanks for this!!

    http://www.memoriesandmacchiatos.com

  • Olivia Vollman
    Reply

    These are my favorite kind of post! Thanks for the good read.

  • Ema-Leigh
    Reply

    I really needed to hear this today! Thank you!

  • Kimberly
    Reply

    I thought this was wonderful! Your words truly spoke to me!

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      Olivia Rink
      Reply

      Thank you so much for reading Kimberly, xoxox

  • Demi
    Reply

    Helped me immensely on a hard night like tonight. Thank you <3

    • http://oliviarink.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/gravatar-olivia-rink.jpg
      Olivia Rink
      Reply

      So glad you came across this post. Thanks so much for reading Demi, wishing you the best in 2017 🙂

  • Isabelle
    Reply

    Olivia, thank you for this post. Since you also live in Chicago, any tips on where to meet good quality guys??

  • Ellen-
    Reply

    I have recently started writing in a journal, and this post has given me a lot of inspiration for what to talk about and the kind of person I want to become, and particularly the way I want to think. I love the quote you included about having power over positive thinking- as a college cheerleader as well I do the same thing before taking the mat, something I haven’t done in the past, and it really takes the nerves, and the fear out of the skill. Your posts truly inspire me and I would love reading more about what is on your mind and what inspires you.

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