Sometimes it’s refreshing to take a break from posting about material things and to take a day to write about the deeper stuff that’s been on my mind lately and publicly answer some re-occurring e-mail questions I get from you guys.
I’m also really bummed today because I had to drop Chris off at the airport last night, so sometimes it helps to talk about your problems out loud. Sooo here we are.. comments/feedback much appreciated and thanks for the therapy sesh in advance.
As you guys know, I’m in a long distance relationship – he’s in California and I’m here in Indiana. We spent the past 2 weeks together in Kentucky and Indiana and cherished every. single. minute. He’s my best friend and life is so much better when he’s around, but now I’m sitting here all depressed because it will be another 4 weeks til I see him again. Which brings me to my first thought:
1.”I’ll be happy when…”
I’m guilty of saying or at least thinking this phrase all the time. We all do it – we say that we will finally be complete/happy/satisfied once __________ happens, or once I’m making ______ amount of money a year, or once I’m no longer in a long distance relationship and life is normal and I can sit on the couch and eat pizza and watch The Office re-runs with my real-life-boyfriend (ugh). Looking forward to your goals, dreams, and expectations is such a great thing, but too much focus on the future can completely rob you of joy in the present. Just like anything else, focusing on finding peace in the now takes practice and constant self-reminders. (I previously wrote a whole lot more on this topic in this blog post). So, count your blessings, tell/show the people you love that you love them, and live in the moment, because it’s so much more important to pay attention to what’s happening right in front of us than to constantly focus on what’s ahead of us.
2. The more you serve someone, the more you love them. And the more you love someone, the more you want to serve them. It goes both ways. One very important thing Chris has taught me in our relationship is that love and service go hand in hand. We argue, plans fall through, I PMS and get mad at him for no reason, he forgets something I’ve reminded him 400 times, we get snippy with each other because we’re hungry, I get mad he can’t read my mind, silent treatments, the list goes on and on people – no relationship is perfect. A happy and healthy relationship (friendship or romantic) takes patience and effort, and one way to always feel more appreciative and in love with someone is to serve them in a selfless and Christ-like way.
3. Just a few quotes that make you think…
4. “How did you become so successful with what you’re doing and can you tell me the steps you took to get there”
I get some version of this e-mail all the time, and every time I read it I laugh. It goes to show that NO ONE has life figured out – including me – and every single day I’m still trying to figure out what I want to “be when I grow up”. I think sometimes people think there is this secret formula for success – the right major, the right connections – but what it really comes down to is hard work, taking risks, believing in yourself, and more hard work. You learn as you go and figure out the things you’re good at and take the opportunities your given. School, internships, and job experience have a little bit to do with what career you pursue in the future, but more importantly it comes down to thinking hard about what you’re passionate about and not limiting yourself to the career options you think you’re capable of. The people that are most successful in their field are the ones who are obsessed with what they’re doing.
5. Make time for people. As you get older, you realize how much you took the days for granted when you lived in the same dorm, sorority, or at least city with your bestfriends. The times you get to see each other become less frequent and less convenient. Now that I’ve been out of college for 2 years, some of the most memorable trips I’ve been on are the ones planned with old friends. Yes these take more planning, money, and commitment, but they’re so worth it! So stop saying ‘we should’ plan a trip and do it today! Call up your best friends and plan a vacation together to catch up – this is your ‘push’ to actually do it!
6. A devotional for today:
Are you eager for moments with the people you love, or are you too busy for it all – planning to appreciate it “later” when you have time? Time is short and we all need this constant reminder.
-from take my heart oh god by sara young
Hope you’re all having a great week so far, thanks for stopping by!