10 Happy Tips [for 20-somethings]

What’s one thing we’re all really, really good at that does us absolutely no good?… Complaining. We complain about our jobs, about our expensive rent, how we can’t sleep, how we can’t sleep in, when we’re hungry, when we can’t stop eating..the list goes on and on.  And let’s be honest, being 20-something can be weird. There are so many uncertainties and situations that leave you feeling unsettled and confused.  If you’re struggling at all with finding contentment during this transitional stage of life, I’ve made a list of 10 things that have made an impact on my overall happiness lately:

1. Comparison Sucks.  Social media feeds alone are enough to drive you completely insane with all the engagement rings, baby pictures, fitness challenges, and people going overboard on that ‘facetune’ crap. It’s especially bad in the blogging world with a bunch of accounts posting about expensive new shoes or bags that cost more than my car. It’s easy to compare yourself to other’s “internet lives” and get the feeling that your life sucks. You have to stop the constant comparison, because it will drive you crazy! And keep in mind Instagram & Facebook do a great job of making life look a lot ‘cooler’ than it really is.

2. Daily Devotional. Most mornings I find my self rushing out the door because I really wanted that  extra 10 minutes of sleep, but my days always start off on a better note when I make time to focus on what really matters before heading to work. Taking a few minutes to deepen and strengthen your relationship with God in the morning will definitely help you feel more content with life and at peace with things that you might be struggling with. My two favorite devotionals I read are ‘take my heart, oh god’ by sarah young and ‘jesus calling‘. Writing your thoughts & prayers down in a journal is a great way to clear your mind and organize your thoughts. This little journal by Val Marie Paper is perfect for that!

3. Focus on Others. We are constantly trying to find ways to make OUR lives better – new clothes, new haircut, new cars. Lately I’ve been trying to put more of a focus on other people in my life and their happiness, and in turn it’s made me a happier person. Call your grandma and make her day. When a friend texts you to do something this weekend, choose to go with her instead of just staying home. Seeing the people you love happy will make you happy! And it will change your perspective.

4. Healthier = Happier. When you’re sad.. you eat like crap. It’s the truth and I am definitely guilty of this. Even when I’m not sad, but I’m not on track with buying healthy groceries and cooking my own meals, I’ll make excuses like ‘what’s one more day of McDonalds if I had it the last two days’. When your body is healthy, your brain is healthy and the better you will feel mentally and physically.

5. Learn from the Past. I am a firm believer that we need to experience hard things like disappointment, sadness, and failure, in order to truly appreciate the good things in our lives. I’ve mentioned before that I’ve struggled with some serious insomnia, which lead to all kinds of anxiety issues. If any of you struggle with anxiety I FEEL FOR YOU because it can be so scary and life altering. Any time I’m feeling unsatisfied my current situation, I think back to times when I was really struggling and how I’ve overcome those hard times. It makes me so grateful to be happy, healthy, and living a somewhat normal life (whatever that means).

6. Do what you Love. Take time to figure out what you really love doing, and do it! Are you bored with your job? You don’t have to make any crazy decisions like quit and move to a new city, but you can find time to do something you love on the side like – writing, reading, traveling, cooking, or blogging!  I’ve heard a lot of girls talk about how much fun book clubs are (aka wine clubs where you read sometimes) those sound like so much fun! It’s easy, make your own happiness!

7. Learn to Love Alone Time. Some of you may already be pros at this one, but if you’re like me and like to be constantly surrounded by people, this one’s for you. Whether you’re in a relationship or single, learn to find time for yourself. I know it sounds pretty pathetic, but one of my favorite ‘activities’ during the week is when I’m alone, in my apartment, listening to some kind of chick station on Pandora (I love the Sara Bareilles channel.. lol) while burning at least 2 candles and reading or writing something at my desk. Just you and your netflix, or yoga session, or bubble bath.. or whatever it is that makes you happy and relaxed. Don’t rely on other people for your happiness!

8. You’re in your Prime!! I know it’s so annoying to hear from old people, but it’s true.. we need to realize these are our prime years and to stop taking them for granted. As much as I’ve heard my mom & aunts say it – we really will look back on this time and wish we could re-live it! No kids, no mortgage, no terrible wrinkles or saggy boobs..cheers to being 20 something!

9. It’s a bad day, not a bad life. If you’re anything like me, when one bad thing happens in your life, one hundred other problems come crashing down at the same time. Yes, we’re females and we’re all a little dramatic, but this is a real problem that can be fixed. Change your focus from all your issues, to the one issue that is giving you the most trouble. Tackle it, solve it as best as you can, and move on. This will help clear your mind and get you back to thinking more rationally about life in general.

10. Build your Confidence: I avoid confrontation at all costs, I’m a huge people-pleaser, and as confident as I may seem at times, I still would rather run 5 miles than give a speech or talk in front of a big group of people (and I can barely run 1 mile so that’s saying something).  This is definitely one I’ll need to work on, but the last tip is to go after what you want and don’t be afraid to tell it like it is. The more confident you are with yourself, the more comfortable you’ll be asking for things you want & deserve – Like a raise or an apology you never got. Speaking up for yourself will drag you out of your comfort zone and lead you to the life you want!