This is 30! Today’s the first day of a new decade of my life, so I felt like that deserved a blog post.
It feels very ironic to be sitting here writing this at my parents’ kitchen table…the same spot I used to eat goldfish in a highchair 😂 I’m really excited for my thirties. From what I hear, it’s the decade where you finally figure yourself out. The one where you know who you are and actually start living like it. This is the year I become a wife! And (hopefully!) buy a home with my husband. I can’t wait for this phase of life and feel so thankful to have gained another year of wisdom.
Here are 30 things I’ve learned by age 30…
1.Celebrate tiny wins. I’ve never really been one to make a big deal about birthdays (including my own). In quarantine I gained a new appreciation for celebrating little victories. John made a huge deal of both mine and Con’s birthdays last year in NY and they are days we’ll never forget. You find a lil bit of magic in the mundane when you pause to celebrate.
2.Done is better than perfect!!!
3.Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is slow down. Possibly the biggest lesson I’ve learned in the last 2 years. If I’m feeling burnt out, exhausted, or uninspired, I try to give myself permission to check out without feeling guilty about it. Talk to mom. Talk to God. Read a book. Write in a journal. Go on a walk. Give yourself space so you can find clarity. This works every time I’m burnt out. Especially if you’re in a creative field, sometimes you need to do the living, thinking, and experiencing to sharpen your perspective and transform it into your work.
4.If you want to make the world a better place, start with yourself.
5. Seek to make an impact not to impress. “I had a moment the other day that really changed my perspective on how I view my physical appearance. I was thinking: no one has ever impacted me by being beautiful or having a perfect body. It might get my initial attention or even be inspiring, but it’s never been the reason I remembered them.” – Becca Tilley
6.Get close with people who see the world differently than you. Share ideas. Ask questions. Debate. Learn from each other. Welcome opinions that don’t align with your own.
7.Become an expert fake tanner (and always wear sunscreen!). Still mad at myself for being obsessed with the tanning bed in high school. I’ve been using self tanner for a long time now and have gotten to the point where it looks better than my real tan..win/win 🙂
8.When you feel anxious or down, do something for someone else. Send a meal to your friends who just had a baby, go see your grandma who’s alone at home, send the book you just finished reading to a friend who might need it. Whenever I shift my focus from my own problems and put that energy into others, my problems immediately seem smaller.
9.Become a plant lady. They make you happier 🙂
10.Prioritize what’s important to you. “By figuring out things that are NOT important to you, you decrease your options. And if you do this, you will have accidentally – almost innocently – put in front of you what is important to you by the process of elimination”. -Matthew McConaughey
11.If they like you, you’ll know. If they don’t, you’ll be confused.
12.Your darkest trials will make you stronger. Hardships teach you resilience and give you wisdom that you can pass along. “Tell the story of the mountain you climbed. Your words could be a page in someone else’s survival guide”.
13.If you don’t know your purpose, you will inevitably feel out of place. Heard this on an episode of The Porch podcast and had to write it down. I think and write about purpose a lot because it’s one thing we’re all trying to figure out. The more we become the person God intended us to be, the more confident we become. It’s what allows us to be who we really are even if it that doesn’t align with what the world says is popular or admired. The more I lean into my faith, the more clear my purpose becomes.
14.You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with. You eventually start to talk, act, and think like the people you’re around the most often. Surround yourself with people you want to rub off on you because believe me, they do!
15. Cultivate your relationships outside of the one with your significant other. This takes pressure off your spouse to fulfill every one of your needs.
16.Read more books. The book Mere Christianity changed my life. Read it before you’re 30!
17.Appreciate your parents. They’ve sacrificed so much for us! Learn from them and appreciate every day you have them.
18.Replace contempt with gratitude and it will change your life. Instead of focusing your time on wishing you had a better spouse, mother, sister, etc. Focus your time on becoming a better spouse, mother, sister, etc. “Just when we are most eager to make ourselves understood, we must strive to understand. Just when we seek to air our grievances, we must labor to comprehend another’s hurt. Just when we want to point out the fallacies and abusive behavior of someone else, we must ruthlessly evaluate our own offensive attitudes and behaviors.”― Gary L. Thomas
19.Always better to be the one who smiled than the one who didn’t smile back!
20.Choose your hard.“Marriage is hard. Divorce is hard. Choose your hard. Obesity is hard. Being fit is hard. Choose your hard. Being in debt is hard. Being financially disciplined is hard. Choose your hard. Communication is hard. Not communicating is hard. Choose your hard. Life will never be easy. It will always be hard. But we can choose our hard. Pick wisely.”
21.Be more verbally appreciative. Don’t forget to appreciate people – out loud – for the things they do. If it’s not verbalized, it’s a missed opportunity to give praise. Words of affirmation make a huge impact! The more specific you can be about what you value — the more positive your impact is likely to be.
22.Don’t take things personally. When people make a judgement/critique about you, it’s rarely ever about you. In fact, it’s almost always about them, their issues, their needs, and their desire to control the situation.
23.There is beauty in delayed gratification. We are obsessed with instant gratification. But anything truly worth having, takes significant time to earn.
24.Monitor who and what you follow on social media. You become the content you consume.
25.Consider professional organizers to do a deep dive on your home/apartment. Life changing.
26.Don’t stress about your timeline. Mine looks different than most of my best friends! Rushing into something you’re not ready for is the best way to make the wrong decision. Take your time and let the pieces fall into place. Plus, when you’re always rushing to the next phase of life, how can you enjoy the one you’re in?
27.Change the way you define beauty. So so so thankful for the women in my life that remind me what real beauty is.
28.Become a morning person. I was always a night owl until I met Conner. Going to sleep earlier, getting 7+ hours, and waking up early is underrated! (Wow do I sound 30 or what?). Be strict about your sleep schedule and bite the bullet with an early alarm. You won’t regret it, plus it will make falling asleep at night easier.
29.Find a good hair stylist and stick to them! I’ve been going to the same stylist since my first haircut.
30.My life is continually transformed when I’m reminded to seek truth in scripture. It really is the best manual for life. I don’t know why this works, I only know it does work: if your heart is driven by the desire to draw closer to Jesus, you will find joy by becoming like Jesus.
Thank you for guys for hanging around and growing up with me on here :,) All your support and birthday love is making me emotional today. LOVE YOU xo, liv
Photo sesh by the best: @aesthetiica <3